Finding Your True North

I left school 20 years ago. Aside from revealing my age (which for me has always just been a number) I feel younger than ever. This feeling is probably only temporary having just spent two weeks on holiday in France with my wife and two daughters, who kept me running around and playing with them non-stop!

Our annual summer holiday coincided with me being invited to my school in the South of France as their guest speaker for their 2018 graduation ceremony. I was asked to share with this year’s cohort what I’ve learnt in the last 20 years, but more importantly to try to inspire them on how to find their own ideal career path.

The speech went along the lines of…

”Thank you for that kind introduction and thank you for inviting me to speak today.

I’m very honoured to be part of this wonderful occasion. Congratulations to those graduating and also to the families of those graduating, because you should know that your support through the process will have been absolutely vital.

Now, I’m sure many of you have firm plans for your next steps in life, clear goals and a vision of how to reach them, but perhaps some of you are just amazed to be here like me 20 years ago!

I can vividly recall my own graduation in 1998 when the speech was given by the EasyJet founder, Mr. Stelios Haji-Ioannou. If I am honest I don’t recall much about his speech aside from the fact that, like you tonight, I’m sure, I desperately wanted him to hurry up so I could have my first drink of the evening and make my way down to Cannes!

Seriously, though, I won’t keep you all night and I’m sorry I don’t have an amazing personal success story like Stelios’s to share.

I didn’t become a tech billionaire by 30 by inventing a social media app. I didn’t drop out of University and then achieve global stardom by changing the way the world works!

On the plus side, exactly 20 years ago today, I was sitting exactly where you are at this very school so I’m going to offer you two pieces of advice that I hope are at least relevant to you.

But first let me very briefly explain where they come from.

At your age, I had big plans for myself.

I wanted to remain single for life and never have kids, retire within five years and live in Mougins, drive a convertible vintage Porsche 356 and travel the world in my yacht, wear my hair long, live in a big house in Bali and play tennis at Wimbledon every summer!

20 years on, here I am.

I’ve known my wife for 16 years, been happily married for 11 of those and have two beautiful daughters who are in the audience today, I live in Singapore, own a chocolate Labrador and run rather than drive my convertible to work every day.

Instead of traveling the world, I spend my vacations at Club Med with my kids and instead of playing tennis at Wimbledon, I watch it on TV!

In short, life didn’t turn out the way I thought it would, but I don’t regret a bit of it!

You see, I haven’t failed, I’ve adapted.

I‘ve found what makes me happy and fulfils me and so will you.

So here is advice I read about recently and inspired me to share further. 

Many people will tell you that an ideal career comes from following your passion.

Don’t just follow your passion, but always bring it with you.

Think of your career path as just that a path. The path for a conventional career is well-known and predictable. The path for your ideal career is foreign.

Discovering and following it requires determination and courage and a hefty amount of humility, but it does not require is a plan. Because you can’t plan a course for navigating a path unknown! Instead, what we need is a direction of travel –  a rough idea of what interests you, but not one that’s so rigid you can’t adapt.

This is your True North.

To start with, your True North is not picture perfect. It often starts with an imperfect, fuzzy recognition of your interests and abilities. It requires being deeply honest with yourself about your current likes and dislikes while being open to new possibilities.

It starts with identifying a general direction and recognizing along the way what you don’t want to do; a simple process of elimination.

It also means experimenting with directions of potential interest.

For that, you have to start having a lot more experiences: internships, side jobs, meeting new people.

Pursue your own True North;  not a destination you ever get to, but a compass for maintaining the direction you want to explore.

Then there are the traits you need to keep going in that direction. It’s always tempting to hope that the dream opportunity you’ve always wanted will fall in your lap, but that’s like winning the lottery.

If you really want to succeed, what you need is not a lottery ticket, but two key character traits : persistence and hard work. These are traits anyone can develop. Too many people think of talent as something you’re born with, not the product of hard work.

According to the Stanford University Psychologist Carol Dweck – “there are two different kinds of mindset. Those with a fixed mindset think talents are simply fixed traits and those with a growth mindset think abilities can be developed over time.

Not surprisingly, people who believe talents are fixed don’t work as hard and give up more easily. Why bother with the effort when it’s all for nothing? The growth mindset, on the other hand, spurs people to constantly strive to improve themselves and their abilities. These people stick with it.”

Success on your path toward your own True North and an ideal career is not about being the smartest, or the most talented person. It’s about whether you’re still on the path when the next opportunity arises and for that, you need lots of persistence and hard work.

So that’s my advice for tonight. Your future is in your hands, no one else’s.

Seize every opportunity, take some risks, learn from your failures, have some fun along the way, but never stop moving towards your True North.

I wish you the best of luck in all your future endeavours.

This is the end.

Thank you!”